nobody's home.

a video we made on the first day of terms break last month LOL.

its harder to swim against the flow, there are prices to pay.

hoping to get done with iu soon. and hopefully everything is gonna be okay. am i excited? of course i am, its something i've dreamed about, its an ambition and im so near to accomplishing it. but i'm even excited about getting done with all the drama. maybe its just not worth it, losing so much and gaining so little. the sense of accomplishment i've anticipated is not here, maybe not yet.

the message i forward to everyone after pengetua's rejection (which was more like shoo-ing me back into class and not giving me any sort of chance to explain)...

"hey guys, bad news. pengetua rejected my proposal for iu. but i'll do it ayways, legal or not. i totally understand if anyone of you dont wanna join this project cos there'll be risks to take. so whos with me?"

within 10 minutes, my phone vibrated so many times. inbox was lagging.

i was grateful.

i really was.

11 yeses, 2 nos.

then the nos reduced to one, which was good news.

and i was still grateful. i am still grateful.

there is no hate inside of me. just confusion.

everything comes with a price tag nowadays, even friendship.